May 2012
1 post
04/12:
JEWEL’S NIGHT WITHOUT ARMOR
Our panelists discuss prostitution etiquette, goop hooch, marshmallow tricks, soda thieves, lightning-based superpowers, and beautiful crotches.
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April 2012
1 post
03/12:
HARUKI MURAKAMI’S HANDLESS MUPPET
Our panelists discuss the ins and outs of Japanese literature, the proper way to treat your lover on an individual mandate, who’s chewing whose food, all the joys of being phenomenally wealthy, myths about China, and torsoless bodies.
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March 2012
1 post
02/12:
BRUCE VILANCH’S AMBULANCES
Our panelists discuss piggyback bandits, tween eating competitions, splatforms, frozen Thin Mints, parn, Pinterest, and bringing order to the Jiffy Lube.
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January 2012
1 post
01/12:
VINCENT GALLO’S BUG PENIS
Our panelists review their predictions from the beginning of 2011 and laugh in the face of defeat by making all-new predictions about 2012. Plus, they compete to see who can correctly fuck, marry, or kill ALF, Captain Picard, and War Horse.
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December 2011
1 post
12/11: BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH’S HUMAN MASK
Our panelists review 2011 by presenting our own top 10 lists: top 10 celebrity deaths, top 10 homophobes, top 10 animals, top 10 trends, and top 10 top 10 lists.
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Show Notes:
Ke$ha - “Blow”
Cage as Superman
Maxim’s Hot 100
Famous deaths
Top 10 cartoon dogs
Horrible misogyny
Top 10 sword and sandals...
November 2011
1 post
11/11: TWO FACE’S OCD
Our panelists discuss the horrible news of child football in Pennsylvania, the mystical and sexual wonder of the modern wampyr, the murderous madness of Black Friday, the complex world of romance novels, and assassination training.
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October 2011
1 post
10/11:
ERNEST BORGNINE’S SECRET HANDSHAKE
Our panelists discuss haunted asses, lemon whores, two-faced cats, baby ghosts, bad video game players, and thought poems.
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Show Notes:
My Ass is Haunted
Lemon Whores
Tommy Wi-Show
Can You Read My Mind?
September 2011
1 post
9/11: ERNEST BORGNINE’S SECRET HANDSHAKE
Our panelists discuss the Republican presidential race, the potential value of Netflix pornography, which ghost moms are worth a second look, exciting updates from the world of post-pubescent hypnotism, beautiful Irish sex lives, and a horror film called Nell.
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August 2011
1 post
8/11: GIANNA MICHAELS’ HAIRLINE
Our panelists discuss the devastatingly mundane D.C. earthquake, the odds Steve Jobs will be replaced by a cross-dressing dictator, the eerie necklessness of Gov. Rick Perry, airborne urine, Conan the barbarian, 9/11, the epic battle of Magneto versus Flubber, the nature of dubstep, and how to buy a hamster.
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July 2011
2 posts
7/11: WARREN BUFFETT’S CHEESEBURGER IN PARADISE
Our panelists discuss the news of the News of the World. Plus, the meaning of the debt ceiling, whether or not Swiss rodents come better in pairs, the murderous nature of Captain America, tiger-suited congressmen on the prowl, the relative merits of rocket boots, and pubic grooming.
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7/11 SPECIAL:
PAUL PROVENZA’S RAPE FANTASIES
Regular panelists Brian Thompson, Christian Walters, and Doctor Atlantis are joined by Paul Provenza, Jamie Kilstein, Dan Dion, Gary Stockdale, and Emery Emery in this special live episode of The Death Panel from high above beautiful Las Vegas, California. Things get a little rapey.
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June 2011
1 post
6/11: DONNY OSMOND’S MAGIC FLOWBEE
Our panelists discuss the creeping replicant problem in the world’s pop music. Plus, we ponder how the Amish can commit techno-sex crimes, expose online lesbians for the shams they really are, prepare ourselves for a Mormon president, bat around ideas for bondage play, analyze dreams about living skeletons, suggests methods for killing a...
May 2011
2 posts
5/11: ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER’S PECS AND GUT
Our panelists discuss the completely non-criminal world of international finance. Plus, we explore the plight of Nazi filmmakers, wonder why beautiful rappers would visit the White House, theorize about the kind of pornography found in Osama bin Laden’s bunker, explore the implications of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s wandering seed,...
A Horse of Ill Repute
amateurscientistblog:
Look at this beautiful thing. It’s a new book of short humor by Jared Juliano, contributor to The Amateur Scientist Podcast and only known friend of Death Panel panelist J.J. Wright. And I can’t recommend it enough. If you’ve ever wondered about the erotic possibilities of model trains, the importance of not being naked while trying to sell your house, or what sort of...
April 2011
1 post
4/11: MARGOT KIDDER’S DENTAL WORK
Our panelists discuss the horrors of the impending U.S. presidential race. Plus, we dive deep into the mysteries of the British language, lament the inattentiveness of our wedding-crazed media, explore the joys of throwing balls for fun, ask when is the right time to tell our children about man-on-man action, look for Lois Lane in the bushes, and...
March 2011
1 post
3/11: BILL PULLMAN’S FUGUE STATE
Our panelists discuss mean, horrible, nasty, no good creatures like the Gingrich. Plus, we reveal our spring wedding guide, complain about your children being all over your Facebook page, ponder the riddles of David Lynch’s Duran Duran concert, give advice on how to avoid bears, and talk to a real Canadian about living in an upside-down metric...
February 2011
1 post
2/11: YAPHET KOTTO’S DEATH STAR RUN
Our panelists discuss flaming hot Columbian districts, the uncertain future of a land ruled by mummies, humanity’s place in a world ruled by machines, our predictions for the 83rd annual Academy Awards, corning huskies, sticky hands, and the resurrection of the woolly mammoth. (Show notes at DeathPanelPodcast.com)
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Show...
January 2011
2 posts
State of the Union 2011: The Quickening →
amateurscientistblog:
Tonight, both houses of Congress will gather in the Capitol Building’s sweet-ass rec room to play a little air hockey, do some necking in their bean bag chairs, and sort of half-listen to President Obama update America on the state of our union.
But unless Joe Biden is mic’ed up and extra…
1/11: ANGELA MERKEL’S VAJAZZLE
Our panelists discuss their predictions for 2011 and score their predictions for 2010. Will Barbara Walters fall victim to the Hollywood Star Whackers? Will Vladimir Putin get a Brazilian? Will a famous racist finally attack China? Will sex education die with the birds and bees? Will lobsters finally win the right to vote? Judging by our past...
December 2010
1 post
12/10: PERCY JACKSON AND THE GHOST DAD
Our panelists discuss leaking information, the ultimate fate of your dead pets, the super future of pornography, “liking” and “poking” your “Facebooks”, the relative merits of plate tectonics versus the Aurora Borealis, swinger etiquette, and backward clothes.
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November 2010
1 post
11/10: SANDY DUNCAN’S TREASURE MAP
Our panelists discuss the state of children’s toys and sex organs in San Francisco, the rising threat of zombies and Pogz, the world economic and youth culture implications of Harry Potter’s end, the relative merits of Ernest Hemingway’s beard versus a T-Rex’s useless baby arms, Malaysian ethnic slurs, and the treasure map on Sandy Duncan’s...